A Resolution of Sorts
Well, having had a day or two to think about things, and having discussed the situation further with a couple of other friends as well as my mom, I think I’ve come to a tentative decision; that decision being to more or less do nothing.
Yes, I could use the extra money that getting rid of my car payment would allow, but I feel as though having to argue with my ex about it and further involve myself with him when I want nothing more than not to have to speak to him ever again, will cause me more stress than the extra money would be worth. Even if I did “sack up” and drive to Daytona in the dead of night to “rescue” my car, I would henceforth have to worry about my ex finding me and simply taking the car back, vandalizing it, and so forth. As I said, I wish to keep drama and heartache to a minimum, and taking my car back, while I have every “legal” right to do so, would simply entangle me further when all I want is to be free from my former marriage. If that makes me a coward then so be it, but I see it as cutting myself loose from a bad situation, rising above, and being the better person.
A complicating factor in this whole dilemma is the fact that yesterday, my ex posted on his Facebook page that I was trying to “take all his money to pay for a boob job.” I’m no longer on his Facebook page, but my friend Rob is, and he showed it to me at dinner yesterday. I am in fact planning to get a boob job, though I’m not entirely sure how my ex knows about it; I’m sure he found out through a couple of mutual contacts on Facebook. His posts (there were more than one) made me furious, namely because 1. He has no money for me to take, even if I wanted to; 2. I’ve actually paid a bunch of his bills, including his car insurance and some small utilities on the house where he lives, even though I no longer live there; 3. I LEFT HIM THE CAR THAT WAS COMPLETELY PAID OFF when I would have been perfectly within my rights to take it and make him buy another one; 4. I LET HIM STAY IN A HOUSE WHOSE MORTGAGE WAS PAID SEVERAL MONTHS IN ADVANCE; and 5. I’m taking out a loan for the boobs which my BF is going to help me pay back. Sure, by asking him to trade cars I was attempting to lower my expenses, but this was in order to pay down the balance on my first credit card, which was maxed out from PAYING A PARTIAL DOWN PAYMENT ON A CAR SINCE I LEFT MY OTHER ONE WITH MY EX and BUYING A NEW COMPUTER SINCE I LEFT THE OLD ONE AT THE HOUSE FOR MY EX TO USE. So yes, I am a little miffed (she understated) that my ex would, in his wearisome, delusional way, characterize me as a shallow, money-grubbing bitch when he has no idea what is going on with my life or my finances. (This is not the first time he has made judgments and spread rumors about me based on complete misperceptions/fabrications, by the way.) The fact that he is generally civil to my face and then goes behind my back making things up about me and trying to turn my friends against me (he has also started rumors about my BF, not surprisingly) does make me want to punch him vigorously and repeatedly in the nutsack, but as always, I will refrain. Any of my friends who would see his Facebook posts already know my situation, and would realize that he is just being a bitter dicksneeze who hates the fact that I left him, and that I have friends and a job and a new life that he is no longer privy to. So even though my fingers itched to at least send him a nasty little message or post a cheekily passive-aggressive Facebook status in retaliation, my reasoned response is to ignore him and let him look like the asshole. My mother, who went through similar fucknuttery with my infantile father when she divorced him, agreed that it was better to just live my life, not worry about what my ex thought of me, and let him be swallowed by his own self-pity and vindictiveness. Sound advice from my awesome mom, who I am proud to have taken after. Love ya, Mommy.
